"There are notes between notes, you know." -- Sarah Vaughan

Friday, January 29, 2010

This sounds a little like me and my brother

This week's "Dear Prudence" (scroll to the second letter) hits a bit close to home in that it sort of describes the relationship between my parents, my brother and me.

Dear Prudence,
My mother recently passed away, and I was named sole beneficiary of a $20,000 life-insurance policy she'd taken out without anyone's knowledge. She also left a letter, explaining that while she and Dad had helped my brother "Ted" financially throughout the years, they had done very little for me. She said she hoped the insurance money would make it up to me and my family. Ted immediately started hollering about how unfair this was and said I was obligated to give him half. His reasons? He's broke and my family "doesn't need" the money. Ted thinks he can work at a menial job, have his wife stay home, and still live a middle-class lifestyle. He's blown money he doesn't have buying into get-rich-quick schemes, and when anyone suggests he get a second job, he gets huffy. My husband and I also work blue-collar jobs, but we live within our means. I'm proud that I never asked Mom and Dad for anything once I left home, and $20,000 would make life for my family much nicer. I've thought about giving Ted a token amount, $1,000 or $2,000, but I don't want him thinking he can get money out of me anytime he wants. Do I owe my brother a share of the insurance?
-- Don't Know What To Do

As I said last week, I won't post Prudie's response, you need to click on through and give Slate.com their Web traffic so they can keep doing what they do.

Anyways, my mother has told me that all her insurance and other monies turn over to me when she passes away. She's leaving my brother nothing. Her reasoning? He got all his while she was alive. She has given me EXPLICIT orders not to give him a dime and don't let him or anyone else guilt me into going against her wishes. She also has written these things down so there is no confusion.

So here's how I would respond to the "Dear Prudence" writer:

Dear Don't Know What To Do: Your mom not only left the money, but she left a letter explaining exactly what she wanted and why she wanted it that way. Tell your brother to kick rocks. -- SingLikeSassy

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Is my mama a freak?!

My mother and grandmother are very old school-ish in that they are all about "doing what you need to do to keep your man happy." In other words, stay on top of your game.

To that end, I was being devilish (I thought) and playfully mentioned my pending pole dancing/strip aerobics classes to my mom letting her know I was doing alls I could to make sure she keeps her beloved always-right-in-her-eyes son-in-law.

Her response? "Oh you're going to love that! I did it two years ago."


Now, aside from that being too much damn information (and I truly believe she spoke before thinking about who she was talking to), what DA HELL is my MAMA doing taking sexy stripper dance classes?!! I can't. I'm done.

::takes aspirin, lays down with cool compress on forehead::

Monday, January 25, 2010

Tomorrow I kick off my Couch to 5K program

Mr. SLS is a runner and would like me to share that activity with him. I've always wanted to be a runner but I've been too lazy to do it. This year is the year I get started.

And this is how: http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/2_3/181.shtml

I work best with a goal and a map.

I hope to be able to run a 5K by my birthday in April. Wish me luck, or better yet, join me!

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Donatella Versace: NO MA'AM

If you *know* your body looks like an empty sausage casing, you should keep it covered. This is horrific!

And to 10-cosmetic-surgeries-in-a-day Heidi Montag Pratt: Tape this to your refrigerator so you can see how you will look in 10 or 20 years.


Saturday, January 23, 2010

This cannot be fashionable

I think this might be one of the ugliest shoes I have ever seen. And it costs almost $100. Who is wearing this?!

Friday, January 22, 2010


This is what I'm jamming to tonight! Listen to those horns and that bass line.

"Date with no boundaries. Flirt with no fear."

I added Black 'n Bougie to my Google reader today because this writer has a great voice, but also because I thought she said some interesting and truthful things in this post. Click on over there and read it.

Black 'n Bougie: Date with no boundaries. Flirt with no fear.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

E'ry now and again I read something that makes me laugh and laugh and laugh...

Like this BS from "Dear Prudence" today:

Dear Prudence,
Last summer, my husband and I rented a house with another couple for two weeks. We've all been close friends for many years, and I considered the wife to be my best friend. Recently my husband confessed to having slept with her once during our vacation, after we'd all had too much to drink and the other husband and I had gone to sleep. He begged me not to reveal to my friend that he told me, since, of course, they had sworn themselves to secrecy. I have forgiven my husband for being stupid. I know that he loves me and has no intention of repeating what happened, but my feelings toward my friend are very ambivalent. If I can forgive my husband, I should also be able to forgive her, but this is difficult because I can't talk things out with her without giving away my husband. It's also very hard for me to maintain our formerly close friendship knowing about this breach of trust. Should I just try to forgive and forget, or spill the beans and possibly wreck a longtime four-way friendship?
-- Ambivalent

I won't post the response, you need to click on through and give Slate.com their Web traffic so they can keep doing what they do, but I will give you MY response if I were writing this column:

Dear Ambivalent: This ain't even a problem. You don't maintain a "friendship" with someone who would sleep with your husband. I can't think of ANY situation where this would be alright. That is not a friend. And I'm side-eyeing your husband, too, cause of all the women in all of the world, why he gotta cheat with your friend?! Cause she was there and accessible? Lazy bastard! And then ask you to keep it a secret that you know cause he doesn't want her to know he betrayed HER trust by telling you about how they cheated together and betrayed YOU? Do you see the craziness of all this now that I have written it out for you?

Dat ho would be dead to me. Husband would get cut. Stop playing. -- SingLikeSassy

Monday, January 18, 2010

Songs Of The Civil Rights Movement -- NPR

"...jazz and jazz/blues versions of some of the songs that sustained the civil-rights movement in the 1960s (and beyond) through the setbacks, the hardships, the failures and the many hard-won successes that have moved America ever closer to racial equality." -- NPR

I'm rarely bored...

One of my old roommates never understood how I was never bored. She wasn't a reader and on a rainy or really cold day would watch TV til that got old and then be left with nothing to do. Plus her main hobby was shopping.

I have a younger brother as you know but we were raised pretty much like only children because of the gap in ages and I learned early on how to amuse myself. As long as I have books to read, I am fine. I also don't need to connect with people all of the time.

I'm an introvert (I know I have friends reading this now saying STOP LYING!, but it's the truth). I have to work at being social and friendly. I am terrible in big groups. All of that is tiresome and draining for me. I prefer more one-on-one interaction or smaller groups.

It's hard to get close to me. It amazes me sometimes the people who consider me a friend and refer to me as friend that I consider an acquaintance.

As is often the case here lately, this blog post is pretty much about nothing. Sorry. Lost my blogjo.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Missing my cat babies

Last fall we took my cats down to stay with my mom. Our space got tight with the addition of my things and they had begun to need more attention than we could provide.

My family loves my cats and my mom wanted company so it was a win-win because I could still be connected to them. They are now my mother's cats. She spoils them with daily treats and my aunt visits and brings them treats and rubs bellies for hours on end and my uncle visits and scratches ears for hours on end -- cat heaven! that's where they are now. My mama is happier. I did the right thing.

But I still miss them bouncing all over the bed in the morning trying to get me to wake up and feed them and following me around and walking on my head and purring in my ear. I've been watching these videos for the past couple of days and laughing laughing laughing.

This one reminds me of my orange tabby:

And this one reminds me of my gray tabby:

Saturday, January 9, 2010

I'm staying RIGHT HERE BABY!

So the career opportunity that was great and not so great at the same time didn't happen. I don't feel badly about that either because I gotta say I was not feeling pulling up roots and moving to a new city and state at this stage of my life.

And, to tell the truth, I didn't want to do the job. It's more of the stuff I've been doing over the past few years and I'm trying to shift to some different content. At my current place of employment I've been working on doing more of the things I want to do and in recent months have found I'm being called on to do more of it.

BUT it was the kind of gig I could do for a year and then use its juice to bounce to something else I *wanted* to do. And for that reason alone, I was willing to seriously consider it.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Your goals for 2010?

Did you set some goals for 2010? Financial goals, relationship goals, career goals, family goals?

I always start off the year with a list of goals, usually focused on finances, because I like money. LOL! But they also often involve personal enrichment goals -- taking a class, learning a new skill, experiencing something NEW, expanding my horizons.

As a couple we set some financial goals last year that we didn't quite achieve but we didn't completely blow off either. I also had the goal of getting my house situated one way or the other by Dec. 31. That goal was accomplished. I wanted to lose some weight, and I did that, too.

We set some new financial goals this year and began putting our plans into action immediately. I intend to lose more weight this year and become more active. I'm thinking about taking some pole dancing lessons. Why? I dunno. Cause. Mr. SLS said that was a limited "goal" as we are not putting a pole up in our house. LOL!

Anyway, this is rambling but there is a point in there somewhere: What are your goals?