I have a coworker who is pregnant. That's nice right? Not so much.
She's the third woman I work with to have a baby in the past 18 months, but you'd think no one had ever had a baby before this chick got pregnant.
She has spent the past 7 months complaining about how big she is and how fat she's gotten and how her clothes don't fit and how she has all these inconvenient doctor appointments and so on and so forth.
One day this chick fixed her mouth to ask me to send her all the links for ideas I had saved for my nursery cause she wanted to use them for her nursery. Then she asked me to come to her house and help her decorate her nursery. *blink* If I haven't been to your house in all this time, why am I coming now?
Now, I know some people reading this may assume I'm bitter because of my barren womb. Nope. When the other two ladies were pregnant we feted them with gifts and they talked about and showed pictures of their nurseries and I was even part of the emergency plan for one of them in case they went into labor at work. They send me pics and we talk about their kids all of the time, watch them at day care on Web cam and they even bring them to work sometimes just so I can love the babies up and play with them.
No, it's *this* chick that's on my last nerve.
Yesterday she gets to work and the first thing out of her mouth is, "I told my husband if I go into labor at work you would take me to the hospital because you drive so fast in your little sports car." I just frowned and blinked at her because, um, you and whatever offal and other yuck that falls out from between your legs are not getting in my "little sports car."
Later in the afternoon I was trying to track down a reporter to verify what I thought was an error in something that had gone live on the Interwebz (I was right, it was wrong) and she comes to my desk to prattle on about something to do with the baby/her belly and I cut her off by saying, "I am working." She makes a face like I'm a bitch (I am) and walks off. Then when I put my laptop in my bag and pushed my chair in at 6 p.m. she asked, "How do you do all your edits and leave on time everyday?!" I said, "I work instead of chitchatting cause I have a life outside of this building and I want to get to it" and then I walked off.
I can't wait until this baby gets here in two months so she can take her ass on maternity leave.