Monday, May 3, 2010
Earlier today CreoleinDC asked posters on her blog when was the last they had gone through a rough patch.
I am going through the roughest patch of my life right now. On all fronts. Up until this past weekend, I kept it all to myself. I like to fix my own stuff. People bring their own perspectives and experiences to your situation and can lead you astray. And I don't want advice, I want an ear, I want to vent and get it out. Often people want to tell you what to do. I know what I'm going to do or I *will* know what I'm going to do as soon as I figure it out. Don't tell me what I should do.
Also, I don't like being asked a lot of questions and I don't like that when there isn't a problem, so pelting me with a lot of questions when there is a problem means I'm going to shut down.
But not talking to anyone about it meant I wasn't talking. To anyone. Friends called, calls went to voicemail. Text messages came, I read them, but rarely responded. Emails arrived in my inbox and sat there unopened.
Last week I lost 9 pounds. In one week. I'm fat and weight loss is good for a fat person, but, this is stress weightloss.
So I talked it out this weekend and woke up this morning exhausted but feeling better. After another conversation there seemed to be a breakthrough of sorts on the problem. Or at least a pause button.
Then at 2:15 p.m. I got a call with some fugged up news I didn't want to hear or receive. I would have left work and come home to burrow, but I had no choice but to get through the rest of the day at work because every.single.damn.body I work with called in sick today.
Tomorrow I will find out if the fugged news is gonna stay fugged up. The tides have got to turn. Got to.
There is a silver lining. I kicked ass on Wii boxing tonight.
So far 40 is not the business.