"There are notes between notes, you know." -- Sarah Vaughan

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Making friends

A friend of mine had a post today about making women friends so I'm stealing her idea and riffing on it over here. Read her post though cause it's good!

I am terrible at making friends. Terrible, I tell you. I am chatty (often it's nervous chatter because I am shy, but I work hard NOT to be) and will talk to most people when I meet them, but it's the follow up -- the getting numbers and calling later and stuff that I don't do. It's not that I don't want to, it's just that it's awkward. And feels slightly stalkerish. (<--this is me showing I'm insecure)

Thank the baby jeebus it's not awkward for everyone otherwise I would have no friends. One of my best friends is Honeysmoke. We met at in a newsroom in another city and state long ago. She got there about two months before I did. I had one built-in friend there already -- my best guy friend, who helped recruit me to the paper -- and was kinda making friends with another colleague, who was a sorority sister and lived in the same apartment complex I had chosen. But, I was still new, it was the first time I had lived so far away from home and I was homesick.

Anyway, my first week there a happy hour at a newish club came up and Honeysmoke asked another coworker if they wanted to go. He said no, then told her to "ask the new girl." So she did. We went and 14 years, two weddings, three home purchases, moves to new cities and states, two babies, several IVF treatments and a pending divorce later, we are still friends.

One of the things that keeps me rooted in D.C. at this point (because I really want to be down South where the winters are milder) is that it took me so long to make friends. I don't want to start over.

2 comments:

  1. "...but it's the follow up -- the getting numbers and calling later and stuff that I don't do. It's not that I don't want to, it's just that it's awkward. " So true. I am terribly at making friends too. I think it is because I'm an introvert and I don't mine being alone.

    ReplyDelete
  2. well, i don't remember any of that about our first meeting. i, too, have a hard time making friends. the good news for me is that the few good friends i have in my life have been in my life for years and years. they live all over the country, and i can visit them every now and again.

    ReplyDelete

Use your inside voice ... or I'll put you outside. -- SingLikeSassy