"There are notes between notes, you know." -- Sarah Vaughan

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Family Matters

Having my mama here has been so helpful because it turns out some of the things I need to get done (refrigerator delivered, light fixtures/ceiling fans installed, heavy mirror hung) can happen since she's at the house.

I *do* miss having family here that I can count on like that. I mean, Mr. SLS was family and I know that for a little bit at least, I can count on him to do stuff like deal with the HVAC man and pick me up when I have to drop my car off at the garage, but still, having FAMILY around that you can call on in an emergency is priceless.

One thing I got tired of when I was single was feeling like I had to do everything, fix everything, solve everything by myself. Every house crisis, every financial crisis, every medical crisis -- all on me. I am not looking forward to that again. Not at all.


Monday, May 16, 2011

Mama SLS is here

Y'all know I love my mama, but for real that lady can pluck a nerve. She was asking all KINDS of questions this morning. At 6:30 a.m. *blink*

Anyway, Mr. SLS was at my house early to deal with the HVAC guy because I was too mad with him to be civil early in the morning. After that all got worked out satisfactorily, it was time for me to go to work and as we were leaving the house my mama said, "Mr. SLS, you're leaving too?" And we all laughed and then they hugged really really tight and he made sure my mama locked the door up.

I see stuff like this and know that, even though our marriage didn't work out, I didn't choose a bad person to be married to. If that makes sense. I've spent much too much time thinking about what I didn't see and how I missed this clue and that hint and, at the end of the day, I didn't miss anything. The person I am divorcing is, for the most part, the man I fell in love with and married. But, people's needs can and do change. His did and mine didn't. He tried to stay the course with my vision but that didn't work for him, which ultimately meant that we can't work.

And it's funny, this time last year I thought there was no way in hell I could live without him. No. Way. I used to rush home from work just to get home to him. And now, I see him but...it's not the same. I still care for him, but it's not the same.

So, that's all I have for you today. My house is coming along so well! My mom loves all I have done to it! Take care everybody!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

I like cussin'

I can cuss like a sailor. I don't know where I got my potty mouth from as my parents don't really cuss.

Some folks say only ignorant people are unable to make a point without using profanity. And maybe I AM ignant. But I do believe that, "I aints to be f**ked with" is a stronger statement than "Don't mess with me, OK?" See with the former, you might think I'm ignorant but I bet you will leave my ass alone. Amiright?

Anyway, instead of going to sleep last night, I got caught up watching Jackie Brown. Now, I'm not a Tarantino fan. I fell asleep during Pulp Fiction several times before I actually watched the whole movie from beginning to end. But Jackie Brown? That movie is hilarious to me.

There are many lines I quote (in my head cause I can't walk around saying this stuff to people everyday) from that movie regularly, but this line, right here, delivered perfectly by Samuel Jackson, sums up so many things for me, including my marriage:
"See? You bring a motherfucker up, next thing you know, they breakin' ya off some goddamned disrespect."
And that, my friends, is all I have for you today. Make it a good one.

*drops mic*

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

I love springtime

I don't know if it's because I'm am an almost Easter baby or what, but I *love* the springtime.

Having the sun shining down on me just lifts my spirits. I don't know how people survive in places where it's winter eight months of the year. If I could move farther South, I would pack my ish right now, and be gone.

Have a good one y'all!!!!

Monday, May 2, 2011

Know what I realized?

I missed living in my house. By myself. And not having to consult with someone else about where things should go and what color this or that should be in an effort to compromise and be inclusive and all that jazz.

I like AND HATE the quiet. Sometimes I would get tired of the constant music playing at our house, but most of the time I liked it, especially if Mr. SLS was rehearsing.

The light. His house is a rowhouse tucked inbetween two other houses and was like a dark ass cave. My house is covered in windows and gets lots and lots of natural light.

The closet space. I have more.

The room. I have more.

The parking. I can always park right at the end of my sidewalk.

The neighborhood. It's in the city but more residential so it's quiet.

The washing machine and dryer. Mine are full size, his are stackable. Nuf' said.

The yard. Imma get me a grill this year!

The route to the Metro. More bike friendly because I can ride on the sidewalk which is less stressful to me than riding down the city streets.

And in general there's just less clutter around. I can breathe. *exhales*

I realized some other stuff, too, but I'll save that for another post.

It's my house and I live here!