"There are notes between notes, you know." -- Sarah Vaughan

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

FWBs Follow Up

A few ladies who read my post about Friends With Benefits talked to me about it offline and they all said pretty much the same thing that TiffanyInHouston shared in the comments: They had tried it and regretted it, because what they really wanted (either with the "friend" or just generally) was to be in a relationship.

Ladies, why are we doing this to ourselves? Why settle for so little when we want so much more? And yes, I include myself in there because though I have never agreed to a cocoa-only relationship, I have stayed in situations that weren't giving me what I needed because of fear or laziness.

We have to do better. We have to love ourselves more. We have to be more respectful of and cautious with our bodies and hearts.

Don't get me wrong, I have been celibate for a year. Trust and believe that I understand how sometimes you just want to be held, to be touched, to be kissed. Intimacy is on the Hierarchy of Needs.

But please, let's not agree to these FWB or other "in the meantime" crappy situations when what we really want is a love relationship and all that comes with it.

We are all better than that.



  1. Love your blog - beautiful! And I agree. If you settle for any old thing, you may end up with nothing.


Use your inside voice ... or I'll put you outside. -- SingLikeSassy