"There are notes between notes, you know." -- Sarah Vaughan

Friday, January 13, 2012

My friend is hurting....


It's hard to listen to somebody you love tell you about how somebody else is hurting them. You want to fight on their behalf.

My friend is struggling in his marriage. His wife woke up one day (from his perspective) and decided she didn't want to be married because she didn't love him any more. She was no longer attracted to him.

I listened and pushed him to go for counseling. I never let a negative word come out of my mouth about his wife.

But for real, I wanna snatch the hair out of that chick's head. I didn't just meet him yesterday so I KNOW who he is at heart. He has always wanted to be a GREAT husband and a GREAT dad.

I want to tell her, bish, this brother is smart as hell, a great dad, successful in his career, nice looking, dresses well, has GREAT VALUES, and most importantly, he LOVES YOU and the family y'all have created. This dude is practically in tears on the phone with me trying to figure out how to make you happy and keep his family intact.

But, I can't do that. I don't know her side of the story. I'm his friend. Instead, I listen, I try to make him see it from her point-of-view or understand something she's said or did that he's agonizing over.

Sigh.

2 comments:

  1. CaliGirlED1/13/2012

    Yeah that's definitely a tough one! And  not knowing her story makes it harder. But nonetheless HE is YOUR friend and you need to console HIM. It's good though that you are able to at least attempt to help him understand what she MIGHT be saying and feeling. You know your friend and he's a good guy, maybe they just grew apart, maybe he ignored her red flags from the start. Or maybe she's just another trifling woman making it hard for the rest of us! *sighs*

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  2. You're a wonderful friend.

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